The Middle Path of Parenting

Jai Institute for Parenting • July 26, 2025
The Middle Path of Parenting

Parenting is often thought of as a choice between two options: we’re either in charge or we are permissive. We either lay down the law, or we let it go. It’s easy to fall into the trap of swinging between power over and permissiveness, especially when we’re exhausted or unsure.

But there’s another way. It’s a 
middle path…

 

One that holds both leadership and connection at the center. Here at Jai, we call it the Empowered Parenting path. 


This middle path isn’t always tidy and clear. It requires us to slow down, step out of urgency, and listen for what the moment is asking of us.


It invites us to lead with creativity, not just control. To hold the container without gripping it too tightly. And to let our children relax into our presence, not our power.

Find the Middle Path


When you feel the pull to either take control or give in, pause and try this simple practice: 

 

Take a slow breath and say out loud: “I am stuck between taking control and giving in. I don’t see another option yet – and that’s okay. I’m open to one revealing itself.”

 

Ask yourself:

  • What is truly needed right now?
  • Is there a creative middle path between taking over and stepping back?



See if you can quiet your mind and listen for the answers. Let your body guide you. Wisdom often whispers before it speaks. 

 

Why It Works: 

Children feel safest when they are held, not controlled, and when they are seen, not indulged. Too much control (power over) can create anxiety, resistance, or shutdown. Too little guidance (permissiveness) can also create anxiety, because children don’t yet have the internal structures they need to navigate the world alone.

 

When we toggle back and forth between these extremes, it sends mixed signals, and both nervous systems start to dysregulate.

 

But when we access the space between those extremes, we invite collaboration, clarity, and connection. This “middle path” isn’t neutral. It’s deeply active. It’s where freedom and structure can coexist, and where wisdom replaces reactivity.

 

Through the Coach Lens:

This is where we coaches get to support parents in expanding their capacity and range.

Many parents enter coaching locked into black-and-white frameworks: 

If I don’t come down hard, I’m being weak. Or, if I don’t give my child what they want, I’m being harsh.

 

Our job is to normalize this binary thinking and gently challenge it. One helpful reframe is to name the middle path as an empowered path that allows for boundaries with softness, flexibility with clarity, and leadership with deep listening.

 

We invite our clients to notice their own nervous system cues. 

 

Are they contracting into control or collapsing into appeasement? 

 

Helping them access internal safety is the first step to parenting from freedom rather than fear.



This week, we invite you to try something different… not just “more leading” or “less leading,” but something new altogether.

Parenting doesn’t have to live at the extremes. When we pause, feel into the moment, and trust our inner wisdom, we begin to parent from a place of deep presence and quiet strength.

 

And that’s where true leadership lives.


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