Parent, How Can You Show Love Today?

We parents love our kids so deeply. We have the best intentions for them. We want them to be happy and to thrive in their lives.

And yet—that love is not always felt by our kids. In our beautiful intentions to maximize their happiness, love gets contorted. It morphs into layers of fear-based control, lectures, conflicts, and power struggles.

Our leadership collapses under the pressure we put on ourselves to be “good parents.” We struggle with the guilt and shame that comes with parenting, and then we lead from there. Love gets lost in the heat of it all. 

How much do your kids feel your love?

Love is felt in the quiet moments of presence and appreciation. It is felt through our twinkling eyes as we marvel at their majestic beauty. It is felt through our joy as we watch them grow. It is felt through our warm hugs as we radiate messages of “I’ve got you. You are safe here in my arms.” 

If this feels far from your reality, know that you are not alone. Be gentle with yourself and notice the temptation to weaponize this message toward yourself with inner messages like “you need to do better.” Modern parenting is filled with anxiety and an obsession with getting it right. We have forgotten how to be with one of the most natural and intuitive human experiences: raising our kids. 

Practicing Mindfulness WITH Our Kids

Here is a tool to try on this week: Mindful Moment While Parenting

When we think of mindful moments, we imagine being alone and taking time to slow down and be with ourselves. Those are beautiful moments. The idea here, though, is to be mindful with our kids. 

How?

Stop everything you are doing. Breathe. Put down the “to-do list.” Put down the phone. Turn towards your kids. Meet them exactly where they are and what they are doing. See how much attention you can give them and the moment. 

How much of your love can you share with them?

• Notice the details of their faces—the way their smile curves up at the corner, the way their eyes move, and the words they say. 
• Notice their hands and feet—how big or small they are and how their fingers and toes curl. 
• What other details do you notice? See how much appreciation and joy you can allow. 
• How much love can you radiate to your kids through your warm and appreciative presence?

This moment is special. This moment is important. This moment is all we have. 

Your courage to slow down and let love in is helping to heal the world.