What exactly is confirmation bias?

Confirmation bias is a powerful filter that we see the world through, that helps us (often incorrectly) interpret information. 

We go out into the world carrying a set of beliefs about everything. We have beliefs about ourselves, our capabilities, the way the world works, what opportunities exist and a whole host of other thoughts we have incorporated into our understanding about the ‘truth’ of the world.

This applies to everyone. We all do it whether we like it or not. 

How confirmation bias operates is that you essentially unconsciously go around looking for all the evidence you can find to support your current beliefs. Your mind also generously filters out anything that doesn’t match what you believe, reinforcing only what you currently hold to be true. Not exactly the height of accuracy. 

So even if you are surrounded by opposing evidence, unless you are consciously paying attention and actively working to shift your beliefs, you will continue to believe what is in line with your original view.

Approaching life this way makes us feel safe. We like our own opinions and generally surround ourselves with people who see things the same way. That way, when we look around or talk to people around us, we’re always right, case closed. 

The problem is, unless you are holding all kinds of wonderful beliefs about yourself and the world around you, this filter can really keep you from seeing the truth and creating new experiences and levels of success, especially when it comes to building your business.

How does confirmation bias affect your business?

It’s not hard to put together the impact this can have on you when you’re branching out and doing something new like starting a parent coaching business. It can also serve to hold you back when you’re trying to reach new heights of success within your existing business.

Confirmation bias can work against you in several ways:

1) Downplaying (or completely ignoring) success

If you don’t believe that you are likely to succeed, your filter will only seek out and highlight evidence to confirm this. 

What does this look like exactly? It looks like downplaying wins, “I was only able to book the talk at the school because my sister-in-law works there” or “The client only said yes to working with me because I gave them my introductory price, they probably wouldn’t have said yes otherwise.”

The first step to overcoming negative confirmation bias is to CELEBRATE your wins. No matter how small. Catch yourself whenever you hear yourself downplaying or justifying your success as a one-off. 

Every single win counts as evidence that you can do this. Keep track and revisit it often.

What beliefs are you holding about yourself that could be holding you back? Here are a few examples I hear a lot from the coaches I work with: 

• “I’m not really a business person”
• “I’m not good at selling”
• “I’m not very confident talking to people” 
• “People aren’t going to want to pay very much for my services”

The truth is that none of those things are facts. Beliefs like these, if left unexamined, will really undermine your efforts. The good news is, you can easily improve those beliefs through a willingness to learn new things! (I know you like learning new things because you’re reading this article!!!)

2) Encouraging you to stay small 

While it may be hard to grasp, your ego doesn’t really want you to take risks. It wants you to stay perfectly safe. After all, you can’t fail if you don’t try. 

Finding conclusive ‘evidence’ that you really aren’t cut out to run a business is (unfortunately) the fastest way to relieve your anxiety when you feel anxious about your ability to succeed. 

That’s why jumping to the conclusion that your business isn’t working when it’s taking longer than you imagined to build, can be an ‘easy’ way to remove yourself early from the fear of failure (and success). 

What you can do if you find yourself having thoughts of safety over success:

• Treat your ego like you would a scared child and start by not letting it be the captain of the ship.
• Listen to your deeper wiser voice that knows that you are meant to do this work, that you can do this and that the most dangerous thing you can do is not try. 
• Reassure your ego through calm internal coaching that not only is staying small and safe not a great life plan, it’s also not going to lead you to living the kind of life you desire. 

When fear creeps in, take back the reins, use enthusiasm and possibility as your antidote and find ways to reconnect deeply with all your reasons for doing this work. 

3) Ignoring what isn’t working

I see this one less often but it still deserves to be mentioned. If you are not getting the results you want over time, it’s worth getting fresh eyes on what you’re putting out into the world.

Sometimes people get so stuck on a great idea that they ignore the signs that it’s not working. No matter how wonderful you think something is, if it doesn’t speak to your audience, it’s not going to help you build your business. 

One mistake I see people unknowingly make in marketing is talking to your audience about what you believe they need, instead of talking to them about what they think they want. 

Read that again. 

Even if the solution you are offering is ultimately going to accomplish both, people are only going to listen if you’re offering them what they want. 

Be open to feedback from trusted sources, even if it’s not always what you want to hear. I want to emphasize trusted sources. Make sure you're getting feedback from people who have some expertise in marketing where possible, or if you’re asking for feedback from friends, make sure you choose ones who will be honest with you.

Keep a growth mindset. Learning when running a business is a constant. Stay open to shifting and pivoting as needed and allow yourself to enjoy the process of learning.

The good news is, you are not powerless over this bias. Like all outlooks that operate unconsciously, the first step in changing them is awareness. But that’s not where it ends. You must actively work against confirmation bias if you want to change it.

Three steps to overcoming confirmation bias in your business:

Open your mind to new possibilities

Intentionally apply a lens of possibility to the world around you. Pay attention to your thoughts and catch yourself when you find yourself minimizing or denying what is possible. Write these down, then write down 2-3 reasons why the opposite could be just as true.

Parent coaching is an exciting field to be running a business in! But don’t be surprised if not everyone agrees (including the voice in your head that sometimes undermines your enthusiasm). Some people have a critical lens and don’t mind ‘helping you’ by trying to poke holes in all the potential you see. Don’t let them. Surround yourself with people who see your vision and support you in making things happen.

According to The International Coaching Federation Global Coaching Study done in 2020, the entire coaching industry is expected to reach $20 billion dollars by this year (2022). So the possibilities for running a coaching business are truly incredible. 

Get creative when it comes to places you can connect with potential clients. Change the filter in your mind to a place of curiosity. Make a game of it. See just how many new sources of potential clients you can come up with!

Prove yourself wrong

If you find yourself being plagued by negative thoughts or questioning whether you can indeed build the business you want, it may be time to challenge yourself to step into a new identity. 

Remember that even though you may have a filter in place that may not initially support your success, you can always build a case for the other side! 

Prove yourself wrong by taking action and gathering evidence that supports your new way of being in the world. You are as capable as anyone else. You can learn new skills, new habits and try new things. You don’t have to be good at anything instantly. Keep supporting yourself in the same way you would a beloved friend. 

If you get stuck, ask someone who loves you to reflect back to you the gifts that they see. If someone like that is not available, make a list of all the times you have accomplished something, overcome a situation or changed how you are in the world. 

Remember your well worn beliefs aren’t facts, they’ve just been repeated enough to be believed. What would you rather believe instead? It’s time to start repeating something new that supports your new beliefs!

Do some research

Start reading books that are in line with where you want to go. Listen to podcasts that offer perspectives on what you need to learn or new viewpoints you wish to adopt. There are countless ways to go about building your business and getting the skills you need. 

Is it time to join Toastmasters so you can get comfortable speaking in front of people? Do you need to practice doing discovery calls with friends, family or other parent coaches you know so you can try new things and see what feels good to you?

One step at a time, start to make moves in new directions that allow you to experience new things, meet new people and learn more about who you are and how you want to move through the world.

This is your life to do with what you wish. If you feel limited by your current lens, you can always reinvent yourself. If you are reading this, it’s not too late to see the world through new eyes.

Just a word of caution… 

We’ve covered a lot here. Your mind may be tempted to go in ten different directions. Keep it simple (because a confused mind does nothing). 

Just identify one belief you want to shift and get started! 

Meet Your Author, Katie Owen

Jai Business Coach & Marketing Mentor

As a former practicing therapist turned copywriter and marketing strategist, Katie is passionate about the intersection of marketing and mindset. Katie embodies the practices of taking the simple actions, consistently over time, that create epic results.

A master storyteller, Katie works with our coaches to refine their message, increase their visibility and get clients!